Have you ever watched a movie or a TV show where the main character is clumsy, super awkward, and makes tons of mistakes? Whatever he or she does, something always goes wrong and they are being laughed at by others. Maybe this was an extreme example, but have you ever felt like that person or at least can understand what he or she may be going through? Well, I certainly do — something doesn’t go wrong all the time and others don’t always laugh at me, but I do have good amount of moments where I felt like that clumsy, “not-so-popular” main character.
At work, I get comments from my boss all the time for not being so detailed. When I present in front of others in a meeting, my voice sounds awkward and I don’t have a natural flow. For the technical knowledge that I should know by now, I still have questions. I’m that person who’s not super smart but gets by by having good attitude. The person who’s not the most desirable, but gets work done. I admit, there were times where I will feel upset and angry with myself for not being “great.” Other times, I will feel discouraged and depressed when things go wrong the harder I try. But, here’s the thing — that’s just who I am.
We all have someone who we want to be. For some, it can be those lean tall Victoria’s Secret models. For others, it can be that rich guy, Mark Cuban from Sharks Tank. For me, it has always been those people who are extrovert, confident, and great at their profession. Who are always surrounded by people and is in the center of attention. I’m not saying there is anything wrong with wanting to be that “special” someone or wanting to be better. What I am saying, though, is maybe the qualities of those people may not fit you the best. And, in fact, they may actually take away your uniqueness. It’s like wearing a Chanel suit when you look better and feel most comfortable in a yoga pants.
In my opinion, accepting who you are is one of the challenging thing to do in life. Well, at least that’s how I feel. Being true to yourself and staying true despite what others think seems to be easier said than done. So I decided to come up with three simple ways that can help you (and me) to embrace who we truly are:
#1 DON’T LOSE YOURSELF
There’s nothing wrong with trying to develop and improve personally. However, if you admire someone or want to become like someone, focus on the factors that made them successful rather than trying to become that person. For example, I admire people who are good at public speaking. If I were to practice on “copying” and “mimicking” the tone and the way that person speaks, I may, all of a sudden, sound like a professional but I will lose my unique tone and the speech will no longer sound like me. The point is, don’t try to be someone else to an extent that you will lose yourself, but rather incorporate those desirable traits into your unique personality.
#2 BRUSH IT OFF
I will still be clumsy and make mistakes. However, when that happens, instead of falling into feelings of despair, just “brush it off.” I’m not saying you shouldn’t work on improving yourself. Whether it’s minimizing mistakes, losing weight, or building your business, please continue to be better. The point is, if you do happen to stumble upon barriers and fall, don’t delve on that fact and move on.
#3 JUST DO IT
More often than not, I’m hesitant about what I say or what I do because unconsciously I worry that others will judge me. When that happens, thoughts in my brain start convincing me to stop my words and/or actions. So before your brain starts to over-think, just take action. Practice to do one thing a day that you would like to do but don’t normally feel comfortable doing in front of others. For me, I do enjoy making friends and building relationships. However, I don’t always feel comfortable making small talk so I try to practice everyday by making small talk to strangers, other parents, and co-workers.
When you see 3 year-olds, they don’t seem to care about what others think whatsoever. But somewhere along the line of childhood to adulthood, we’ve learned to hide our true color. Let’s rewind ourselves to the time when we were 3-years old and be true to our emotions, feelings, beliefs and most importantly ourselves. 🙂
Picture Credit: by Eutah Mizushima (Unsplash.com)